FAQs

This month is known as the July that nearly killed my blog. Three weeks of things I could post about and yet nothing has been posted. I have four posts in draft form (pictures loaded even), I have more pictures on my phone and camera and I have felt inspired for the past three Sundays to record my thoughts about a great lesson or quote that strengthened me but zilch has been posted. Boo. Moving over those posts for now I'm answering FAQs for the masses (read- the 7 people left reading this blog, ha!).

1. Is your divorce final?

No, not yet. It will be quite soon though (less than 2 weeks, I think?). I have a suitcase full of different emotions but the biggest one right now is relief. It's been a long, emotional road to this point and I feel relief that this stage will soon be over. Big sigh.

2a- How are you? 2b- How are you? 2c- How are you?

Yes, this question comes in three different versions. It's funny. I'm good. Better than good. I have so much to be grateful for in my life. I get through most days like every other mother on the planet. I clean up, cook meals, get frustrated, shed few tears and mix in some fun. That's normal life, right? I've had to step outside of my box in a lot of ways and that's a good thing. That is not to say I don't have some hard times. A few weeks ago I worked my heart out on cleaning the garage. It had not been clean and organized completely since we moved here. It was a huge job. I came across wedding photos, our wedding book and things from Milo's dad that I was not expecting to find in a random box. I cried hard for an hour. That was a rough one. I kept pushing though those tears and have felt so much accomplishment over that garage. Not just because of organized boxes against a wall either. More because I could move through those painful tears (for an hour even, good grief Melanie). A few months ago I would have ditched that job after the first tear and photo. Baby steps are still steps, that's a lesson I'm learning.

3. Do you want to get remarried? Will you get remarried?

This makes me laugh too. I find this question equal to asking a new mother with a four day old baby on her lap, wearing maternity jeans and sporting a postpartum bump if she's planning on having more babies and when. Refer to question #1.

4. What are you going to do?

 I'm going to live just like I have been all along and especially the past year (plus). I work as much as I can cutting hair (July is a s.l.o.w. month), I take care of the house/the laundry/the yard with the kids help, I go to church and teach a Sunday School class, I read scriptures with the kids (we're about halfway through Alma), I'm hoping to start school in about 6 weeks (more on that later), I snuggle my kids, I laugh and I'm going to keep my head up high. This is not what I wanted or would have chosen but nonetheless, I am here. This wasn't really short, but in short, I'm going to be me. I recognize I'm a constant work in progress, I have much to improve upon. This quote really meant something to me in Relief Society yesterday (such a great talk from President Uchtdorf)-

'Your Heavenly Father knows that you will make mistakes. He knows that you will 

stumble—perhaps many times. This saddens Him, but He loves you. He does not wish to break your spirit. On the contrary, He desires that you rise up and become the person you were designed to be.' ~Dieter F. Uchtdorf 

5. What is your theme song?

Technically, no one has asked me this question but if they did, I would have an answer in two different categories. Music was too painful to listen to for months and months last year. I just could not handle the emotions it surfaced. For the most part I've moved through that (now I change the song faster) and music strengthens me. A favorite church song- Hymn #85 'How Firm a Foundation'. Specifically verses 3, 4, 5 and 7. Good stuff right here.

3-  Fear not, I am with thee; oh, be not dismayed,

For I am thy God and will still give thee aid.

I'll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand,

Upheld by my righteous, upheld by my righteous,

Upheld by my righteous, omnipotent hand.

 4- When through the deep waters I call thee to go,

The rivers of sorrow shall not thee o'erflow,

For I will be with thee, thy troubles to bless,

And sanctify to thee, and sanctify to thee,

And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.

5-  When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie,

My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply.

The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design

Thy dross to consume, thy dross to consume,

Thy dross to consume and thy gold to refine.

7-  The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose

I will not, I cannot, desert to his foes;

That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,

I'll never, no never, I'll never, no never,

I'll never, no never, no never forsake!

Non church music-  'Stronger' by Kelly Clarkson. It's an older song but still a favorite. Plus Reed can sing it with me and that is definitely an added bonus.

What have I missed? Anything you're dying to know but I didn't answer?

(Now it's back to the frozen posts, August better be good to me and my blog)